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Working Mom -vs- Stay at Home Mom

I want to start by saying kudos to the stay-at-home mom, especially those home-schooling; I bow to you for your endeavors at home; and frankly wish I could be a stay-at-home mom, although…the home-school thing would definitely NOT be happening in our house. I dearly love my children, but if I had to be their teacher I’d have to be committed.

​Now, you working moms….I feel your pain, and some days I mean that literally. Working moms aren’t able to spend as many hours in our own homes, or with our children as we would like to, although we are still responsible for the day to day running of our homes….that’s why mine looks like a tornado hit it most of the time. On those rare occasions when someone comes over and the living room/dining room/kitchen areas are so so very clean…..I’m laughing on the inside because I know what an absolute dump the back bedroom is…..because that’s where we stashed all the lingering ‘stuff’ that was littering the living room and dining room.....and we pray no one has a reason to open the oven while company is there because that's where we stashed the dirty dishes I didn't have time to finish washing before company arrived. Don’t be fooled, us working moms might LOOK like we’ve got it all together but realistically something has got to give, there literally just aren’t enough hours in the day for us to possibly get it ALL done.

​The best laid plans….let me tell you from experience; no matter HOW much you plan, schedule and think you have everything set to run smoothly…..HA, you’re fooling yourself. At least two days a week my day goes to poo and I have to completely revamp the plans and schedules – it could be a sick child, a sick co-worker, car problems, a phone call from a friend in need….doesn’t matter what it is, it happens. So, we moms, whether stay-at-home moms or working moms; we have a 3 year old temper tantrum (you know the one, with the stomping, yelling and arm flailing), then we take a couple very deep breaths and turn on those very creative XX chromosomes that God graced us with and deal with the NEW chaos so that we can finally get to the end goal of the day….our nice soft beds and sleeping children.

​Society no longer refers to us as “moms”; we are now labeled as “super-moms” and our family thinks we’re magicians, after all, the groceries magically appear in the frig and the laundry magically appears clean in the dresser drawers, right? We work very hard with usually no or little appreciation from society, it is now regarded as “our duty”, whether we are stay-at-home moms or working moms, to maintain the “Donna Reed” persona. We are not super-moms but in reality we truly are many things; chefs, maids, doctors, veterinarians, chauffeurs, bookkeepers, gardeners, teachers, personal consultants, receptionists, referees, if you have girls – hairdressers…..and I’m sure there is much that I have not listed but you get my point. Society says our house should be spotless with everyone in cheerful moods and neatly dressed……life is not a 40’s or 50’s TV sitcom, this is REAL life and life is messy. My house is not filthy, it’s clean but it’s also very cluttered and things don’t get put away daily. I know I can’t accomplish everything every day so I had to deal my deck of mom cards and cleaning daily was dealt the crappy hand. I work, I accomplish the necessities (laundry, cooking, dishes, baths), spend time with my kids and I try to find a small bit of me time, in exchange for the clutter – and I’ve come to the opinion, if you don’t like my clutter then don’t look at it.

​Ladies, keep heart and remember that regardless of who gives you whatever title, you are first and foremost a person and secondly a mom. There are only so many things you can humanly accomplish each day, you are bound to make mistakes, to forget something or fail someone, or fail at something you’re doing. Don’t try to live up to society’s persona of what mom “should” be, but instead be who you are and be happy (and sane) with yourself and your family.

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